My Respite

I was so scared Allah Taa'la
I still am
I was shaking
trembling

I felt powerless
weak
fragile
unprotected
vulnerable

My heart threatened to
shut down any second

My desires threatened to
consume me any moment

I was so scared Allah Taa'la
and I still am ...

The ground threatened to swallow me whole
Those eyes threatened to burn me alive
My own skin, my own flesh and blood
threatened to turn against me

but You saved me
You saved me

saved me from self ruin
saved me from others who wished for my ruin
saved me from everything that waged war against me

You saved me
You saved me

Even now,
when the moment of heightened fear has surpassed
I think back
remember the difficulty at hand
and feel grateful to You for having my back

But the battle lingers on
with no end in sight
With only You by my side
Do I have hope of respite

With You I am certain
no matter what lies ahead
you will ease the hurt and
free me of dread


Verily, with hardship, there is Relief. (Quran 94:6)
"Verily! Only in the Zikr of Allah will your heart find peace." (Quran 13:29)

:")

Ya Hayyu Ya Qayyum
Ya Hayyu Ya Qayyum

I Apologize yet again hoping You'll forgive me once again

BISMILLAHIRAHMAANIRAHEEM

YA MALIK UL QUDOOS USSALAAM
YA RAHMAAN YA RAHEEM YA ARHAMARRAAHIMEEN
YA ALLAH
YA HAYYU YA QAYYUM

:)

YOU ARE MY CONSTANT COMPANION
YOU ARE LOVE
HENCE LOVE IS MY CONSTANT COMPANION !!!
ALHAMDULILLAH
ALLAH TAA'LA...
I'M SORRY
ABOUT TODAY
THE STARING
AGAIN
IM JUST SORRY :(
FORGIVE ME FOR STARING SHAMELESSLY
FORGIVE ME FOR BEING IGNORANT OF YOU FOR THOSE 5 SECONDS
FORGIVE ME FOR ACTUALLY ENJOYING INDULGING IN DISOBEDIENCE AGAINST YOU!!!! :(:(:(:(
IM REALLY SORRY
I...IT WAS REALLY HARD TO SPEND ALL THAT TIME IN THAT CLASS...BUT ALLAH TAA'LA YOU HELPED ME OUT IMMENSELY ALHAMDULILLAH !!!!
IT WAS JUST THOSE LAST FEW SECONDS THAT I MESSED UP
I CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE WHAT WOULD'VE HAPPENED HAD I DIED THAT EXACT SECOND
HAD my soul been taken away in that moment of disobedience to You ASTAGHFIRULLAH :(
oh dear, save me ALLAH TAA'LA!
FORGIVE ME !!!!!!!
I must have disobeyed you countless times already in this short little lifetime of mine,
despite all the blessings you are constantly bestowing upon me !!!!
how ungrateful and how unbelievably stoopeed i am :(
oh Allah please plase please help me not to repeat this sins!
please help me to more Obedient to YOU!

Ya Rahmaaaan Ya Raheeeeeemmmmm
I need Your Forgivenessssss!!!

I want to ThankYou as well
for this second
this moment
I want to thankYou for making things easy to understand in school today
want to express my gratitude to You for calming me
for building my self esteem
wow
SUBHANALLAH I am amazed at where I am and who I am today because of Your support and Your Love.
ThankYou
a gazillion times over
ThankYou
ThankYou
ThankYou

BISMILLAHIRRAHMAANIRAHEEM
ALHAMDULILLAHI RABBIL AALAMEEN
ARRAHMAANIRAHEEM
MAALIKI YAUMIDDIN
IYYAKA NA'BUDU
WA IYYA KA NASTA'EEN
IHDINASSIRATALMUSTAQEEM
SIRATALLAZEENA
ANAMTA ALAYHIM
GHAIRIL MAGHDOOBI ALAYHIM
WALADDAAALEEEEENNN
AMEEEEENNNN

I Miss You

BISMILLAHIRAHMAANIRAHEEM

YA MALIK UL QUDOOS USSALAAM !!

YA RAHMAAN YA RAHEEM!!
YA ARHAMARRAHIMEEN!!!

MERAY PYARAY ALLAH TAA'LA !!!

THANKYOU
THANKYOU
THANKYOU

It seems like forever since I woke up today
I just wanted to drop by and talk to You :) hehe
Allaaah TAA'LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA :D
I am just so happy I can talk to You whenever I want to !!!!
ALHAMDULILLAH
SUBHANALLAH
YOU ARE SO AMAZING ALLAH TAA'LAAAA
YOU ARE SO AWESOME :D:D:D:D:D

I just miss You so much sometimes and I just want to be closer to You all the time

when I come out here in the world...its like I feel far away from You..Your remembrance
and I don't like that
its like the second You are not in my mind and in my heart, I start to panic
Seriously, I think I might even get cardiac arrest someday if I feel too far away from You over a long period of time

Allah Taa'la...are these white flashes normal ? :S
I am getting slightly frightened ! 0_0

Please Protect me :D
I LOVE YOU

Allah Taa'laaaa
I doooooooooo want to appreciate the awesomeness of the QURAN!!!
I WANT TO APPRECIATE YOUR AWESOMENESS!!!!!!!!!
and I want to appreciate the awesomeness of Your creations !!!!!!!!!
and I just want to be on a constant High of Your Remembrance

SubhanAllah
You are so BEAUTIFUL And Bountiful and Lovelyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
I CANNOT LIVE A SINGLE SECOND WITHOUT YOU

ALLAH TAA'LA I CAN STILL SEE THE FLASHES! :O
are they coming from outside? when a car passes by or something?? :O
OH MY ALLAH THERE IT WAS AGAIN ! :O

Alllaaah Taaa'laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
I really want to fly :D hehe
Flying is sooooo much funnnnnn
I remember flying in my dreams a couple times !
and..since my soul feels like its soaring all the time, I just want my body to soar WITH IT ! :) hehe

Allaaah Taa'laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Please bless my pyaray Nanabu !!!!!!!!!
and please bless my pyari Ammi JAAAAN!!!
and please please please please give them the bestest place in Jannaaaah!!!!!!!!!
:")

Allaaah Taa'laaaaaaaaa
I feel like this worldly work separates me form You
I don't want to feel that way naaa
I want to feel Your nearness all the time!!!!
because Life becomes Beautiful when I have You in my heart

and Allah Taa'la
I really want to study with people too
it gets lonely and distracting when I study alone....
I dunno...what do You say?
Its just so much better to study with People as opposed to being a solo studier... You know...
soooooooooooooooo

I LOVE YOU AND THANKYOU AND IM SORRY FOR BEING DISOBEDIENT AND FORGETFUL AND I LOVE YOU !!!!!!!

YA HAYYU YA QAYYUM
YA HAYYU YA QAYYUM
YA RAHMAAN YA RAHEEM
YA ARHAMARAHIMEEN
YA MALIK UL QUDOOS USSALAAM !!

ALLLAAAAAHHH U AKBAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SUBHANALLAH

SUBHANALLAH

ya hayyu ya qayyum !!!!!!!!

:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

BISMILLAHIRAHMAANIRAHEEEEEMMMM

YA RAHMAAN
YA RAHEEM
YA ARHAMAR RAHIMEEN

YA MALIK UL QUDOOS USASSALAM!!!

ALHAMDULILLAH! ALHAMDULILLAH ALHAMDULILLAH ALHAMDULILLAH
FOR TODAY
FOR EVERYDAY
FOR HELPING ME FEEL SO MUCH BETTER EVERYDAY
FOR IMPROVING ME EVERYDAY
FOR HELPING ME OVERCOME MY IMPERFECTIONS EVERYDAY
THANKYOUUUUU SOOOOOO MUCH THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU

THOUGH I KNOW THAT I STILL...DISOBEYED YOU
I STILL DISOBEYED YOU
OH ALLAH
IM SORRY
IM SORRY
IM SORRY
IM SORRY
IM SORRY

ALLAH TAA'LA PLEASE HELP ME
PLEASE HELP ME I LOVE THESE PEOPLE SO MUCH ALLAH TAA'LA
I LOVE THESE PEOPLE FOR THEIR SWEETNESS
I LOVE THEM FOR THEIR HONESTY
OH ALLAH I PRAY THAT YOU BLESS THEM SO SO MUCH
I PRAY THAT YOU BLESS THESE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE WITH THE GIFT OF ISLAM

OH ALLAH TAA'LA
EVERYWHERE I LOOK I SEE JOY, WONDER, HAPPINESS, BEAUTY, LOVE, FAITH TRUST, HOPE POSITIVENESS
SUBHANALLAH!!!!!!!!
IT AMAZES ME TO SEE THESE PEOPLE SOMETIMES
TI AMAZES ME TO SEE THEIR KINDNESS
THEIR MANNERS
THEIR COURTESY
MASHALLAH
MASHALLAH
ALLAH TAA'LA
PLEASE THESE PEOPLE WITH THE GIFT OF ISLAM !
i seriously feel like these people are so worthy of upholding islam. I feel like these people can truly represent Islam
I feel like they will accept Islam wholeheartedly...
Allah Taa'la...for some reason I reallyy TRULY BELIEVE in these people!

Allah Taa'la
THANKYOU FOR EVERYTHING
THANKYOU FOR ALLOWING ME TO SPEND TIME HERE
AMONGST THESE PEOPLE OF SUCH HIGH MORAL CHARACTER
I THANK YOU
AND I APOLOGIZE TO YOU FOR BEING DISOBEDIENT
AND I WANT TO LOVE YOU IN MY HEART, THOUGHTS, WORDS AND ACTIONS.

ALLAH TAA'LA, PLEASE HELP ME TO FULFILL MY WORLDLY OBLIGATIONS.
THANKYOU ALLAH TAA'LA
THANKYOU FOR EVERYTHING

Allah Hu Akbar
ALHAMDULILLAH

I AM SORRY

BISMILLAHIRAHMAANIRAHEEM

YA ASSALAM! :) :)

SHUKAR ALHAMDULILLAH!!!!
THANKYOU TIMES INFINITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:):):):):)

I AM SORRY TIMES INFINITY AS WELL!!!

YA RAHMAAN! YA RAHEEM! YA ARR HA MARAHIMEEN !

:):):):):):)
PLEASE HELP ME TO ALWAYS LOVE
TO ALWAYS BE AWARE OF YOU
TO ALWAYS KNOW THAT I AM ANSWERABLE TO YOU

PLEASE HELP ME TO KEEP YOU IN MY HEART AT ALL TIMES
PLEASE HELP ME TO LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART ALWAYS

PLEASE HELP ME TO LET YOU AND ONLY YOU LIVE IN THE HOME OF MY HEART!!!!!!

OH MY DEAREST ALLAH SUBHANA U TAA'LA!
I JUST WANT TO FALL HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE WITH NONE OTHER THAN YOU!
I WANT TO DO EVERYTHING FOR YOU
I WANT TO SERVE YOU
I WANT TO SEE YOU EVERYWHERE I LOOK
I WANT TO FEEL YOU WHEREEVER I AM
I WANT TO THINK OF YOU, TALK ABOUT YOU ALL THE TIME !

OH ALLAH
PLEASE
LET ME ALWAYS LOVE YOU
PLEASE
FORGIVE ME
PLEASE ENABLE ME TO BE AMONG THOSE WHOM YOU ARE PLEASED WITH
PLEASE HELP ME TO ALWAYS STRUGGLE IN YOUR PATH.

PLEASE HELP ME
PLEASE HELP ME
PLEASE HELP ME
PLEASE HELP ME
PLEASE HELP ME
PLEASE HELP ME

NOT TO JUDGE ANYONE
NOT TO HAVE ILL FEELINGS TOWARDS ANYONE
NOT TO HAVE PRIDE IN MY HEART
NOT TO LOOK DOWN ON ANYONE
PLEASE HELP ME TO BE HUMBLE
PLEASE HELP ME TO BE A MUSLIMAH WHOM YOU ARE PLEASED WITH
PLEASE HELP ME TO BE AMONG THE WOMEN OF PARADISE

ALLAAAAAHHHHH JEEEEEEE
YA RAHMAAN YA RAHEEEEM
YA ARR HA MARRAHIMEEN

I NEED YOUUU
I NEEED YOUUUUUU
I NEEEEEEEED YOUUUUUUU !!!!!!!!!

PLEASE HELP ME TO LOWER MY GAZE
PLEASE HELP ME TO BEHAVE MYSELF IN ITM TOMORROW
PLEASE HELP ME NOT TO LISTEN TO SHAYTAANS WHISPERS
ALLAAAHHHH
I LOOOOOOVE YOUUUUUUUU
PLEASE ALWAYS BE WITH ME!!!!!!!!!!!

ALLAH TAAA'LAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
:")
PLEASE BLESS MY NANABU AND TRANSFER ALL OF MY NAIKI'S TO HIM!
AND PLEASE KEEP HIM HAPPY! AND PLEASE SEND MY LOVE TO HIM !
AND PLEASE PLEASE GIVE HIM THE BESTEST PLACE IN JANNAH!!!!!

:")

PLEASE PLEASE TEL HIM I LOVE HIM
PLEASE PLEASE TELL HIM I RESPECT HIM WITH ALL MY HEART
PLEASE TELL HIM <3


YA RAHMAAAAANNNNNNNNNN
YA RAHEEEEEMMMMMMMMM

THANKYOUUUU
TIMES INFINITY!!!!!!

FORGIVE ME

YAA HAYYU YA QAYYUM
YAA HAYYU YA QAYYUM

Please.

BISMILLAHIRAHMANIRAHEEM

DEAREST ALLAH AZZA WAJAL

.......
I want him to be among the people of piety
I want him to be among the people of paradise
please please please please please please please please
MAKE HIM NAIK AND INSTILL IN HIM NEVER ENDING LOVE FOR YOU AND THE DEEN AND THE BELOVED PROPHET MUHAMMAD SALALAHUALAYHAYWASALM !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE ALLAH TAA'LA!!! IM BEGGING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MAKE HIM AMONG THE BEST MUSLIMS OF THIS GENERATION!!!
MAKE HIM A RELIGIOUS SUFI, A SCHOLAR OF ISLAM, AND A TRUE MOMIN!!!!
PURIFY HIS HEART ! PURIFY HIS SOUL!!!
HELP HIM YA ALLAH!!
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!

I feel selfish asking you for this
but I just...can't help it.

Bless him!
Bless his family forever!
may they all truly be PAK, PURE ...TAYYAB.

Allah Taa'la.....

please.


ThankYou.


ThankYou for Everything.

You are the only source of PEACE

BISMILLAHIRAHMAANIRAHEEM

DEAREST ALLAH SUBHANAU TAA'LA

YAA HAYYU YA QAYYUM

QUITE TOUGH YESTERDAY HAS BEEN

I DON'T EVEN FEEL GOOD COMPLAINING TO YOU BUT
IT SEEMS YOU'RE THE ONLY I SHOULD COMPLAIN TO

ALLAH SUBHANAU TAA'LA
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE BLESS MY NANABU
AND THANKYOU YA RAHMAAN, YA RAHEEM, FOR TAKING him AWAY COMFORTABLY FROM THIS WORLD.

YA ARHAMARAHIMEEN !!!! YA RABBILALAMEEN!!!
Things feel tougher all of a sudden
Studying...maintaining friendships
smiling...
I turn to YOU for strength
for perseverance
for guidance
for Love
for PEACE
FOR REST
FOR HAPPINESS

I TURN TO YOU
I TURN TO YOU
I TURN TO YOU
I TURN TO YOU
I TURN TO YOU
I TURN TO YOU


YA RAHMAAN YA RAHEEM
YA ARHAHAMARRAHIMEEN !!!
I NEED YOU SO SO SO SOOOOO MUCH
PLEASE BABAJAN KO KHIAR KHAIRIYAT SAY POHNCHADAIN
PLEASE MATH KE SAMAJH ATA FARMA DAIN
PLEASE HELP ME TO UTILIZE MY TIME HERE ON THIS EARTH IN THE BEST POSSIBLE WAY
PLEASE MERAY SAR KE DARD KUM KAR DAIN
PLEASE BLESS MY FAMILY
BLESS ALLOW THEM TO FIND YOU
TO FIND REST IN YOU
TO LOVE YOUM BE OBEDIENT TO YOU

PLEASE HELP EVERYONE IN MY FAMILY TO LIVE LIFE IN THE BEST POSSIBLE MANNER
HELP US ALL TO LEAD LIFE THE WAY YOU WANT US TO LEAD LIFE
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE


WE ALL NEED YOU SO MUCH!
HELP US TO ACKNOWLEDGE THE INESCAPABLE TRUTH OF OUR COMPLETE DEPENDENCE UPON YOU !!!!
HELP US TO TURN TO YOU WHILE WE STILL HAVE TIME BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE !
HELP US TO REALIZE SOONER AND NOT LATER, THAT WE ARE GOING TO RETURN TO YOU
AND WITH THAT REALIZATION, HELP US TO ALSO CHANGE THAT WHICH IS WITHIN OURSELVES
HELP US
HELP US
HELP US
HELP US
HELP US
HELP US

HELP US TO TRUST YOU
HELP US TO LIVE THIS LIFE WITH A BIG SMILE ON OUR FACE
HELP US TO FEEL YOUR LOVE, YOUR MERCY
HELP US TO SEE YOUR PERFECTION EVERYWHERE WE GO

HELP US
HELP US
HELP US
HELP US
HELP US

WE ARE WEAK
WE ARE YOUR SLAVES
WE ARE NOTHING BUT ANTS
EVEN SMALLER THAN THAT
WE ARE NOTHING BUT NOTHING

DEAREST ALLAH SUBHANAU TAA'LA
YA ARHAMARAHIMEEN

AFTER I HEARD THAT NANABU PASSED AWAY,
JUST THE NEWS OF HIS PASSING...IT HAD A GREAT IMPACT ON ME
THE WORLD FEELS DIFFERENT
MY VISION SEEMS DIFFERENT
EVERYTHING HAS STARTED TO SEEM SO TRIVIAL NOW
AND THE ONE THING THAT FEELS LIKE IT MATTERS IS
YOUR REMEMBRANCE

YA RAHMAAN YA RAHEEM
HOW COULD I THANKYOU ENOUGH ?????
HOW????
HOW CAN I THANKYOU IN THE BEST POSSIBLE WAY ??????????

TELL ME MY ALLAH PLEASE!!!!
I WANT TO THANKYOU!!!!!!!!!!!
THANKYOU
THANKYOU
THANKYOU
THANKYOU

HOW DO I THANK YOU IN MY DEEDS?
HOW DO I CONSTANTLY THANKYOU IN MY HEART?

WHAT FORM OF GRATITUDE DO YOU LOVE THE MOST MY BELOVED ALLAH SUBHANAU TAA'LA??????
PLEASE TELL ME
SO I MAY START BEING GRATEFUL TO YOU IN A WAY WHICH PLEASES YOU MOST !!!!!!!!!!



SAYYIDINA KAREEMUN SALALAHU ALAYHAY WASALAM

:) I Can Never ThankYou ENOUGH!

SHUKARALHAMDULILLAH TIMES INFINITY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THANKYOUUUU
THANKYOUUUU
THANKYOUUUU

YA RAHMAAN YA RAHEEM!
YA GHAFOOR UR RAHEEM!

SUBHANALLAH!
SUBHANALLAH!
SUBHANALLAH!

You are NEAR !

BISMILLAHIRAHMANIRRAHEEM

YA RAHMAAN! YA RAHEEM!
AAP KA SHUKAR HAI !
AAP KA SHUKAR HAI !
AAP KA SHUKAR HAI !
AAP KA SHUKAR HAI !

You are Near!
You are Near!
You are Near!
You are Near!

SUBHANALLAH

You are Near!
You are Near!
You are Near!

You are with me WHENEVER I THINK OF YOU!
SUBHANALLAH!

With Your Blessing

Dearest Allah Subhanau Taa'la

:) :D
Well You seeeeeeeeeeeeeee
of course YOU SEE
YOU SEE EVERYTHING :D

ahem
I mean, so, as You can already seee
much much more clearly than meee
I am infact extremely passionate about
writing poetryyyyyyy :D

and and
I want this to beeee
my life's work
and I wish to exclusivelyyyyy
deidicate everyyy single poem
to You!! Allah the AL-MIGHTY!!!!! :D :D :D

Allah Taa'la
I don't want to waste the gift the you Have
so Graciouslyyy
bestowed upon meeeee !!

Hence, as a molecular token of my gratitude to YOU
I wish to utilize this gift of writing poetry
in order to express what I have felt of Your mercy
in hopes of showing people how Loving BEAUTIFUL, KIND AND MERCIFUL YOU ARE IN REALITY

Allah Taa'la
I know I can NEVER EVER EVER EVER ACCOMPLISH ANYTHINGGGGGGGGGG if I am not aided by You!!
So Allah Taa'la,
please please
help me to
1. Always keep my intention pure and sincere to serving YOU
2. ALWAYS KNOW THAT NONE OF THIS IS POSSIBLE WITHOUT YOU. ; I cannot accomplish anything if it is not pre-ordained by You
3. Think, say, and do only That which Pleases YOU! Never ever let me be among the transgressors or the innovators ! ASTAGHFIRULLAH :(

Ya Rahmaan! Ya Raheeem!!!
please bestow Your Rahmat !


Ya Rahmaan! Ya Raheem!
SHUKARALHAMDULILAH
SHUKARALHAMDULILLAH
SHUKARALHAMDULILLAH

ALHAMDULILLAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

YAA HAYYU YAA QAYYUMU BIRAHMATIKA ASTAGHITHU ASLIH LI SHA'NI KULAHU WALA TA KILNI EELAA NAFSI TARFATA'IN

Words of the Wise

The spiritual master Ibn Atallah Al-Iskandari spoke the truth in his
First Aphorism in his Book Of Aphorisms when he said,"

A sign of reliance on your deeds is the lack of hope when you slip into an error."

If we become blinded from Allah and overly reliant on our deeds and willpower alone for success, it leaves for a very painful fall.


Dearest Allah Taa'laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Its funny how I LITERALLY cannot Live WITHOUT writing to YOU!
I feeel so much better once I write to You

Allah Taa'la
I'm sorry I missed maghrib prayer :( so bad I be *sigh*
Allah Taa'la
I am sooooo thankful for the online Zaynab Acad Class!!!! SubhanAllah!!! please please Bless everyone attending the class and the presenter!
I am just humbled about how its like You immediately saw how I wanted to learn more about Your names and wa'laa! BOOM! I got an email about a class on Asma ul Husna! SUBHANALLAH!!! :")
ALHAMDULILLAHI RABBILALAMEEN!

Allah Taa'la . I am also extreeemely grateful for a friend like Sameera!
Alhamdulillah!
and I don't know what babajan's concerns are..well actually I kinda know what they are...but I just think its so lame what he said
is it wrong to say that ?
Allah Taa'la
I personally really want her to live with me but I don't know how to handle this situation properly now.
I feel like I might end up taking things into my own hands again...not keeping babajan fully informed about what I want to do...hence resulting in inevitable misunderstandings 0_0 and maybe even embarrassment

Allah Taa'la...all I know is that I sincerely wanted to HELP sameerah by offering to let her stay at our house with us.
and ...thats all. So Please just do what ever is best .
Please let this happen in the best possible way too. PLEASE

Allah Taa'la
please please bless sameerah and her family ! I pray that we can do sooo much work for you together!! :D inshALLAAAHH!!

Allah Taa'laaaaaaaaaaaaa
Its like, just talking to you five times a day isn't enough for me HEHE :3

You Live and You Learn

......OKAY.
I SHOULD be mature about this
kuch bigra nai hai mera
.....
ohhh deaaaaar
what would I do without the MSA :(
I feel so humiliated

this choora...i fantasize about this choora
and THIS is what i get?

ThankYou
for the humiliation
it taught me a lesson

STAY AWAY FROM CHOORAY GORAS AT ALL COSTS
ESPECIALLY THAT one >_____<
Allah Taa'la....
help naaaaa

Allah Taa'laaaaaaa
I know I shouldn't be a big fat cry baby
my reward lies with You
and EVERYONE is going to be dealt with JUSTLY on the day of DELIVERANCE

SOOO
if anyone says something bad about me
if anyone insults me
is rude to me
orrrr
even, lets say shoots me in the head unjustly
i don't have to worry about getting revenge
i don't HAVE to do anything!
BECAUSE !
i leave me affairs to YOU ALLAH TAA'LA

The Blessed Prophet Muhammad Salalahu AlayhayWasalam went through SO MANY HARDSHIPS FOR THE MUSLIM UMMAH !!
and yet NOTHING demoralized him!
NOTHING could stand in between him and his mission to Spread Islam!!!!!!!!
because, he KNEW ! that ALLAH TAA'LA IS ALWAYS WITH HIM !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SUBHANALLAH SUBHANALLAH SUBHANALLAH

ALLAH Taa'laaaa
I need an imaan booster
I NEEEEEEEEEEED TO BE STRONG
I NEEEEEEEEED STRENGTH FROM YOU

I feel so sad all of a sudden
but I don't want to
why am I feeling sad ?
cause non believer mocked me ?

seriously Aroob...you need to do better than that

ohhh Dear
achi baat hai tumhara stupid sa khawab toota hai
BUT don't fill yourself with resentment
NEVER DO THAT !
ANGER IS VENEMOUS, HARAM!
ab bus losers ke tarhaan angry ya sad honay ke koi zaroorat nai hai is stupid see baat par
just the fact that this is actually affecting you is STUPID and LOSERISH!

so PUHLEASE
have some DIGNITY AND SELF RESPECT.
and IGNORE
NEGLECT
LEAVE IT TO ALLAH SUBHANAU TAA'LA


To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself. ~ Thich Nhat Hanh

*Fight against your ego with the 4 swords of training:

►Eat little
►Sleep little
►Speak little,
►Be patient when people harm you...


*If everyone is pleased with you but Allaah is not,
what have you gained?

And if Allaah is pleased with you but no one else is,
what have you lost?*

YOU ARE ALL I NEED

Deaaaarest Allah Taa'laaaaaaaa
I need Your loooooooove!!!!!!!
Allah Taa'la....okay let me put it This way:
I NEED TO be able to FEEEL YOUR LOVE!!
I don't want my soul to be deprived of that FEELING of Your LOVE!
Allah Taa'laaaaaaaaaaaa

I NEEEEEEEEEED YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUUUUUUUUUCHHHHHH

I COULD NEVER EVER EVER EVER FUNCTION WITHOUT YOU
SERIOUSLY IM JUST SOOOO FRAGILE AND NEEDY AND DEPENDENT COMPLETELY NON-SELF-SUFFICIENT.

ALLAH TAA'LA...AM I ON THE RIGHT TRACK?
PLEASE JUST GIVE ME A SIGN THAT ITS OKAY WHERE I AM AND I DON'T HAVE TO BACK UP.

ALLAAAAH TAA'LAAAAAAAAAA
THANKYOU FOR EVERYTHING.
PLEASE HELP ME LOWER MY GAZE
PLEASE HELP ME STAY FROM WORDLY ATTACHMENTS
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HELP ME NOT TO GET ATTACHED
PLEEEEEAAAAAAAASSSSSSEEEE

ALLAHU ALLAHU ALLAHU ALLAHU ALLAHU ALLAHU

:")

Bismillah Arahmaan Araheeeeeem
Deaaaaaarest Allah Taa'laaa

I know You know that I realllyyy tried hard not to 'fall' today
annnd quite honestly, it was effective!
but i know that You know that I coulda done a lot better
and there were times when I was slipping and tripping >_<
I'm sorry about those trips :[
I'm reallllyyy trying hard to just keep walking....unhindered
Allah Taa'la
THANKYOU somuch for always being here for me
for ALWAYS being the Light that I neeedd
:) I LOVE YOU SO MUCH Allah Taa'laaaaa :')

ThankYou for helping K
I am sooooooo glad that she is more stable now ALHAMDULILAH !
You are the Most Merciful and the MOST Gracious!

Allah Taa'laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
THANKYOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
TO INFINITY AND BEYOND!!!!!!

You are here
listening to me as I speak
Here to hold me
in all the times I am weak

You are here
ready to help me fly
always standing by
to help me touch the sky

and it is right Here with YOU
THAT I feel a Love so true
It is Right here
in this moment
that my soul becomes anew


:") ALLAH TAA'LAA I LOVE YOU !!!

This Ego has to Go

I'm trying to Love You
the way You should be loved
but my ego gets in the way
it keeps leading me astray

when I try to make Da'wah
in hopes of pleasing Your Majesty
my ego whispers to me, stories
of fame, greatness and glory.

when I control my desires
in hopes of pleasing Your Majesty
my ego tells me
I have a right to be happy
I have a right to have fun
until the whispers have their victory
and my desires consume me...

when I try to understand
and study the grand
words of Your Majesty!
my ego gets in the way
tells me I'm smart enough
to find my way
In ignorance, I am asleep


so I pray to You
and beg of You
Your Highness, Your Majesty
to bestow Your Divine favor
upon this soul, so weak
or this ego will most definitely be
the unfortunate death of me.

Stay With me, Forever

Now I'll tell You WHY I LOVE YOU

WELL,
SIMPLY BECAUSE I LOVE YOU
I CAN'T EXPLAIN
I JUST LOVE.YOU.
PERIOD
YOU JUST SO LOVELY, YOU KNOW ?

SO SO SO SO LOOOOOOOOVELYYYYYYY
AND YOU SO PERFECT
AND BEAUTIFUUUULLLLLLLL
AND AND AND AND AND
I JUST DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO SAY HOW LOVELY YOU ARE!
YOU ARE JUST INFINITELY LOVELY! :D
PERFECTLY LOVELY AND LOVING!

I Thank You so so so so so so soooooooooooooooooooooooooo much
FOR EVERY SECOND
EVERY MOMENT
EVERY BREATH
EVERY TIME I BLINK MY EYES

ALLAH TAA'LA
I COULD SERIOUSLY WRITE LOVE LETTERS TO YOU ALL DAY teeheeeeeeeeeeeeee

OH MY LOVELIEST ALLAAAAAAAAAH
YOU ARE SERIOUSLY THE ONLY ONE WHOM I CAN LOVE WITH ALL MY HEART, KNOWING THAT I'LL BE LOVED IN RETURN ! SUBHANALLAH!
YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE WHO I CAN TRUST MY HEART WITH
YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE WHO WILL NEVER EVER EVER HURT ME
EVER!!!!!!!!!!
SUBHANALLAH! SUBHANALLAH!
MEI BUS FANA HO JANA CHAHTI HOON AAP KAY PYAR MEIN
YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO I CAN LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY, KNOWING THAT I WILL RECEIVE LOVE IN RETURN WHICH IS FAR GREATER THAN THAT WHICH IS IN MY HEART!
SUBHANALLAH!!!!
ALLAH SUBHANAU TAA'LA
I REALLY ..IM JUST...SPEECHLESS

ALLAH TAA'LA
I WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT YOU
I WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT YOUR WORDS
I WANT TO LISTEN TO YOU
I WANT TO READ YOUR WORDS
I WANT MY EVERY ACTION TO BE AN EXPRESSION OF MY LOVE FOR YOU
OH ALLAH OH ALLAH OH ALLAH OH ALLAH!!!!
SUBHANALLAH
YOU ARE PERFECT
YOU ARE PERFECT
YOU ARE PERFECT
SUBHNALLAH!

ALLAH TAA'LA
AAP NAY MUJHE YEH MOMENT DIYA HAI
ALLAH TAA'LA
YOUUUU HAVE GIVEN THIS SECOND TO ME
AND THIS ONE
AND THE NEXT
AND THE ONE AFTER THAT

WHY WOULD I POSSIBLY BE DUMB ENOUGH NOT TO SPEND IT IN YOUR REMEMBRANCE?!
WHY WOULD I WASTE A GIFT THAT YOU, YOURSELF, THE LORDS OF THE WORLDS, HAVE BLESSED ME WITH????
HOW COULD I EVER EVEN THINK OF WASTING THIS GIFT?
THE GIFT OF TIME
AM I INSANE?
OH ALLAH, I WANT TO UNWRAP THE GIFT OF LIFE, WITH LOVE AND CARE
I WANT TO UNWRAP IT PEELING AWAY ONE PIECE OF TAPE AT A TIME
ONCE I HAVE IT UNWRAPPED, I WANT TO FOLD THE WRAPPING PAPER WITH CARE, SET IT ASIDE AND STARE IN WONDER AT THE GIFT UNDERNEATH THE WRAPPING.

I don't even know what I'm saying
seriously I have no idea what it synonymous to the gift underneath the wrapping
I don't even know what metaphor is hidden in the wrapping itself...

I wonder though..I wonder what it could possibly mean...

Allaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
stay with me please <3

Does this really NEED a Title? :P

ALLAH ALLAH ALLAH ALLAH ALLAH ALLAH ALLAH ALLAH ALLAH ALLAH ALLAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH


OH MY ALLLAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU

Mind your MIND

these scattered thoughts
these inconsistent, fleeting thoughts

They keep flashing through my mind

they keep flashing in the blackness of my mind.

the mind..is a lonely place.
the mind, is a confused, mixed up place
the mind is so isolated when it is left alone ...it is so nonexistent when it isn't spoken to

why do I say that?
when no one talks to You, and when you dont talk to anyone,
its almost as if, your thoughts don't exist
your mind is apparently, 'empty'

if nothing goes out..it seems as if there is nothing in there either

but that isn't the case now is it?
the mind isn't empty
how could it ever BE EMPTY???
it is overflowing !
it talkssss and talks and talks and talks and talks and talks till the only thing that can shut it up is death or sleep (temporary death) !

the mind
is alive and yet it is dead
it is alive with thoughts
and yet dead when those thoughts keep repeating them self in a never ending circle.

so what are we to do with this mind?
this mind, that we were born with
this mind which can be both a blessing and a curse at the same time?
what are we to do with this mind?

how are we supposed to have a hold on our thoughts?
how are we meant to use it ?
what are meant to use it for ?

thoughtssssss
the miiiiiind

what is the definition of a healthy mind?
what is the definition of a corrupt mind?
at what point do we 'loose' our mind?
what are the limitations of our mind?

What Is A Beautiful mind?
What is an Extraordinary mind?


For all these questions
all the answers I wish I could find

I will always keep searching,
always keep investigating
always keep using my own mind
to define, describe and interpret the mind

kinda like a computer trying to figure out how its own CPU works
kinda like a computer questioning its own internal workings
I don't think its that hard to understand
because everything I am trying to discover is within myself
it is not beyond me
it is Within me
the understanding of myself
lies Within me

The miiiiiind
what is it meant to find?
what is it meant to know ?
what is it meant to learn ?
in this life...what is my mind supposed to know in order to have spent a successful life?

the mind the mind the miiiiind
a description to its needs I am trying to fiiiiiiind
I am trying to see so I don't die bliiiinnnddd

Keep Holding On

How lovely is life
How sad it is
How interesting it is
How constantly changing it is

Life?
what is it?
it is a process of change
the only thing that is constant in this process is change itself

what else is constant?
Beliefs
values
morals
Love
Allah

In life, only the Intangible things are constant.
So how do we make sure they stay constant if we can't obtain them physically ?
how do we hold on to these intangibles that make life beautiful?
if we can't hold them in a treasure box, where do we keep them ?

we keep them in our heart, soul...
we keep love, our beliefs, Allah in our heart, in our soul
we BECOME these intangible assets
so once you BECOME something
could you ever loose it ? could you ever loose yourself?
the choice,
is Yours .
Hold on to Your Intangible Assests
Hold on to Your self
Hold on to Life